E.C.D.

Ok this is attempt number two to publish this blog entry. I'm so PO'd because I spent like an hour trying to post the first time only to have it time out on me when I tried to publish the entry, losing all of my work! GRRRR! I'm typing this one in wordpad and am going to copy and paste it in, that way if it times out again I'll still have it in wordpad.

It seems to have been a while since I've updated on my Weight Watchers progress, so you may not be aware that I'm still on the program. As of last Sunday, I was down 70 lbs. I'm so happy with my progress, but a little bummed that I won't be down to my goal (down 100 lbs.) before Carrie's wedding. I'm not going to beat myself up though, I'm very happy that I've stuck with the program for nearly 9 months and have done as well as I have. It's taken a lot of will and determination, but it's paid off and I've been losing at a safe and healthy rate. It's impossible for me to lose another 30 lbs. in 5 weeks, before the wedding, so I'm just going to take pride in what I've done so far.

One thing I'm finding now though that I haven't experienced before, is I'm having extreme cravings and find myself thinking about food a lot. For example, back in January while browsing online, I came across a recipe for peanut butter cake...and that's all I've been thinking about since...is having a big slice of that cake. Ryan's birthday is in April, a week after Carrie's wedding and whether he likes it or not, his birthday cake is going to be a peanut butter cake! I will satisfy this craving at one point or another! LOL.

Those you friends who are doing WW as well and who read this, have you experienced anything similar? I'm hoping it will pass soon. I have a couple of theories as to why I may be suffering from E.C.D. - extreme craving disorder. Now that I'm down to a low daily points budget, I'm finding it harder to stay within my daily target. I rarely use my weekly 35 allowance points as well for treats because I feel so guilty using them and I feel that it will take me longer to lose weight, having to burn off those extra allowance points. Before Christmastime on every Friday night after work, I would treat myself to supper at a fastfood place, to help myself not feel like I was on a quote on quote "diet". I cut out going out on Friday nights regularly because of the expense and also because I found that I was starving myself during the days in order to ration my points for the fastfood, to avoid going into my allowance.

Maybe I should just get over myself and start using my weekly points allowance as they're intended to be used, lol, and start indulging in my cravings, to get myself over this hump, lol.